


From Zero to One

by Liza0111



Category: Aldnoah.Zero (Anime)
Genre: Comfort, Established Relationship, Fluff, Happiness for Slaine 2k16, Happy Birthday Slaine 2016, Happy Ending, M/M, Post-Canon, Post-Finale, Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder - PTSD
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-01-11
Updated: 2016-01-11
Packaged: 2018-05-13 05:57:58
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 4,236
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/5697580
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Liza0111/pseuds/Liza0111
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p><em>Unavoidably, this eventually leads to Slaine discovering that he has the right to dance to Inaho’s room at 2am in the morning when he can’t fall asleep, jump on top of the brunet’s bed, and demand dessert to be made for him at this very minute.  </em><br/> </p><p>Continuation of <a href="http://archiveofourown.org/works/5531381">From A Thousand to Zero</a></p>
            </blockquote>





	From Zero to One

**Author's Note:**

> YELLS HAPPY BIRTHDAY SLAINE!!!!! It has been months since az ended, but my love for you will never die ;-; I can't believe a year passed since the first episode of az s2, and I can't believe I have been in az hell for that long.......  
> I thought I wouldn't write post canon fic for a while other than trying to get back to my long fic, but the idea of this fic came to me and I had so much fun writing it. It takes me back to the days when az was still airing (lol)  
> Even after a whole year, my wish for Slaine to find happiness is still the same. I love you Slaine, you deserve all the happiness in the world!

 

 

Dating Inaho is very strange, almost as strange as the hero of Earth himself.

 

After years of thinking of each other as enemies, the term “lover” is about as foreign as it can get when it comes to Slaine Troyard and Inaho Kaizuka. Inaho seems to have an easier time transitioning to their newfound relationship, or maybe it is just because he rarely shows any emotions outwardly. On the other hand, Slaine finds himself still struggling to adjust to his new role as Inaho’s partner.

 

What defines love, how does he show it, and how does he accept it? As a Terran growing up on Vers, the notion of being loved is close to zero, _nonexistent_. Asseylum brought warmth to his heart, but it was only ephemeral, leaving him desperately trying to find something to cling onto as his soul withered in a toxic environment full of hatred and cruelty. He lived for her, devoted himself wholeheartedly to her, only hoping that she will spare a fraction of her adoration to him. That was all he needed to survive.

 

But with Inaho, it is different. First of all, Inaho makes it clear that he doesn’t mind Slaine acting selfishly around him. Unavoidably, this eventually leads to Slaine discovering that he has the right to dance to Inaho’s room at 2am in the morning when he can’t fall asleep, jump on top of the brunet’s bed, and demand dessert to be made for him at this very minute.

 

“Cream puffs.” Slaine would say, his beam bright and sweet beneath the moonlight. “I want cream puffs. With fresh whipped cream. Lots of whipped cream. Right now. Kaizuka.”

 

Inaho would open his eye, stare at Slaine for a while, then frown and shake his head in disapproval. He would nag him, like he is some kind of housewife, again. “Eating in the middle of the night is detrimental to your health.” He would say.

 

“Cream puffs are high in calories and provide no nutrient value.” (Slaine rolls his eyes, what is wrong with being unhealthy once in a while?)

 

“If you are hungry, there are much healthier substitutes, like fresh fruits.” (He scrunches up his face in disgust when Inaho gladly offers one of the options: oranges).

 

He would even compromise, promising Slaine that he will make him cream puffs for snacks tomorrow. But he would take none of it.

 

“Right. Now. I want them.” He would accentuate every syllable, folding his arm across his chest like a spoiled child. At the end, Inaho would always give in. Perhaps it is because he has seen too much of Slaine’s refusing to eat and starving himself back when he was still in that prison, that he will always prefer to have Slaine eat too much rather than too little, even if it is unhealthy sugary sweets.

 

Slaine would watch Inaho take out the flour and his measuring cups from the drawers with a barely noticeable huff with the uttermost angelic smile he could muster. He would try to learn a few tricks from watching Inaho bake, only to be offended later when the brown haired boy apathetically informs him that he should just stay away from the kitchen in general because all he makes is messes for Inaho to clean up. His eyes would light up when the pastry is out of the oven and finally ready to be consumed. Inaho never eats along with him, but he would make some tea for himself and stay up with him, watching him stuff his face with the delicious treat.

 

Afterwards, they would go back to their own separate rooms. Slaine doesn’t further bother Inaho, even if he still has trouble falling asleep and sits on his bed wide awake the entire night.

 

The next day Inaho would promptly wake up at 7am, not a minute late. He wouldn’t let it show, but Slaine would be able to tell that he is tired. Little bubbles of guilt would arise from his heart. He would make Inaho a cup of hot coffee to compensate for waking him up in the middle of the night for his sake, a kiss on the corner of his lips to express his gratitude.

 

They never exchange elaborate love quotes or give each other expensive gifts, but this is a first for the both of them. So it is enough for now, right?

 

 

  

 

January 1 comes quicker than expected, but Slaine is prepared.

 

“If it is your sister or your friends inviting you out to celebrate New Year, don’t you dare ditching them because of me.” Slaine doesn’t bother looking up from his book when Inaho takes his vibrating phone out of his pocket. The brunet stares at him speechlessly. He has made plans for spending the day at home with Slaine, but he chooses to respect his wish. “Yuki-nee.” He answers his phone with a slight disheartened look on his face. Slaine peeks at him from the corner of his eye. He is relieved when he hears Inaho replying to Yuki with “yes, I will be there,” yet his chest is also swelling with bitterness at the same time. His grip on the page of the book tightens, his mind no longer on the black ink he sees.

 

“I will cook dinner for you before I go.” Inaho hurries into the kitchen immediately after hanging up the phone. Slaine feels sorry for him. He probably ruined Inaho’s entire schedule, and he knows how much that would displease him.

 

The brunet manages to cook a table of simple yet appetizing dishes before he has to leave for Yuki’s house, enough to feed at least four people. He hesitates for a bit, before coming up to Slaine and kissing him lightly on the cheek. He is learning too, it seems. “Eat as much as you can. I will return soon.” He promises. Slaine punches him lightly on the arm, chuckling. “Don’t come back too fast. Spend more time with your friends and family.”

 

 _The people who truly deserves your time._ He adds voicelessly.

 

Inaho nods, repeatedly reminding Slaine that in case of an emergency, he can always call him on his cellphone, before Slaine gets tired of it and physically pushes Inaho to the doorway. “Go have some fun, okay? I am not going anywhere. See you.” He reassures Inaho until he is convinced that he will be alright on his own.

 

It is just for a few hours, and he is a legal adult. There is nothing to be worried about. Slaine repeats to himself as he closes the door shut and locks it. He pretends the emptiness living within him doesn’t exist.

 

Slaine sits down in front of the dinner table and eats as much as he could like Inaho had asked him. Obviously, there is no way for him to finish all this food all by himself. He put all the leftovers in the fridge and washes the dishes. It takes him less than an hour to finish all this and now he is left with nothing to do.

 

The time is still early; Inaho wouldn’t be back so soon.

 

He tries to get back to reading his book, but all of the sudden he loses all his interest in this scientific fiction novel he made Inaho buy for him two days ago. He puts the book back on the bookshelf, forgetting about the bookmark on the couch.

 

It is too quiet. This statement is illogical on its own, because it is not like the house is loud at all when Inaho is at home. But he never felt this way when the brunet is present. Right now, the silence is somehow troubling. He cannot help but to be reminded of the prison, _he is alone, all alone again._

 

In a frantic panic, he grabs the remote control, turning on the television with full volume. The people onscreen are all smiling, laughing. He hopes Inaho is doing the same. New Year’s Day is supposed to be spent with loved ones, that is why he can’t allow Inaho to leave his friends and family and stay behind with him. It pains him to think about how many days he has already taken Inaho away from those people who treasure him. How horrified they must be when Inaho spent days, months in the hospital after he shot him in the head, then having him sent back to the battlefield to end a war that almost killed him the first time.

 

They deserve him more than he does. This is fair. This is what he wanted to see, but why is he crying……?

 

Slaine covers his face with his hands, unable to stop the sobs escaping his lips or the tears rolling down his cheeks, hugging his knees closer to him. It is disgusting that he still feels jealous when he has every reason to be left alone.

 

The volume of the television is so high that he doesn’t hear the door being unlocked. Slaine’s brain can barely process it when he looks up and sees Inaho standing in the doorway. It is far too early for him to be home, but why……

 

Inaho doesn’t ask him any questions. He doesn’t even ask what made him cry in the first place. He drops everything by his feet and walks straight towards Slaine on the couch. The blond is surprised when he puts his arms around him tightly for a hug. Inaho isn’t the type who appreciates physical contact, or at least that’s what he thought. The brunet doesn’t even bother taking off his coat. He can feel the cold air around him. Even so, he chooses to hug back with all the strength left in his body. Two people are always warmer than one.

 

“It’s alright. I am back, Slaine.” Inaho says.

 

“Why are you back? I-I told you to spend more time with them.” Slaine sniffles. He hates to let Inaho see him like this. He told him he would be fine on his own.

 

“The last few hours of New Year’s Day, I want to spend it with you.” Inaho explains. It is simple as that to him; he merely followed his wish. It is almost laughable, for someone as smart as Inaho to make silly decisions like this. Out of billions of people in this world, he chooses to fall in love with him.

 

“Is it really okay for me to be this greedy?” He asks in-between sobs, struggling to speak coherently. When did this happen? He never noticed how safe he is able to feel when Inaho is around. He can’t let go anymore. This isn’t fair, Inaho Kaizuka out of all people, is making him feel this way.

 

“Yes. You can have all of me.” The brunet answers, wiping the tears on his face softly. It is a promise that is meant to be kept. He is beginning to feel warmer again. “That is fine, Slaine.”

 

Even if he put up a wall around himself, he is sure that Inaho would somehow find a way to tear it down, forcing him to face this world again, forcing him to see the value in himself.

 

“Happy New Year, Slaine.” It almost made Slaine laugh a little, for Inaho the Expressionless to be trying so hard to be festive when he is sitting here crying with a stuffy nose. Yet, he can’t imagine there to be a better way to start the year.

 

The first year they are officially together.

 

 

 

“Happy New Year, Inaho.”

 

 

 

 

He starts spending less time bothering Inaho and making him bake for him, because the brunet comes over to his room now every time he can’t fall asleep.

 

Slaine finds this soothing, for some reason. Sometimes they would lie down on his bed without a word being exchanged. Sometimes, he would talk about himself. Naturally, there are a lot of things he still keeps from Inaho, things that are too ugly to be exposed, just like the scars that wrap themselves around his body. But he would talk, even about the most mundane memories.

 

Inaho rarely ever interrupts him, but once in a while, he would share stories about himself too. He tells how he and his sister managed to move out of the orphanage and lived on their own. He tells him about how his sister is a terrible cook. He tells him about going to school with his friends. His expression grows softer when he talks about things like that.

 

Slaine keeps on waiting for Inaho to talk about his eye, but he never does, and he doesn’t want to press for more information. At the end, the topic is never brought up. Instead, he kisses Inaho’s left eyelid, and Inaho touches his scarred back, a little too carefully.

 

These may only be small steps, but Slaine can’t help but to think, if they can start being honest about their past, does that mean they will be able to move forward to a better future together?

 

 

 

 

 

Slaine can’t remember when the last time he celebrated his birthday is. It must be a long time ago, before his father entirely immersed himself in his research. When you have the hatred of thousands of people resting on your back, it is difficult to still think of your existence to be worthy of celebration.

 

He never told anyone about his birthday, but of course, Inaho would be the one to know.

 

“Do you want anything for your birthday?” He asks him, plain and straightforwardly.

 

“No. I don’t want anything. I want to spend it just like any other day.” Slaine insists, not giving the brunet room for negotiation. Inaho drops his gaze onto the food on his plate, invisible silence ensues. Slaine knows this isn’t the answer Inaho wants to hear, but he can’t bring himself to ask for more when Inaho has already done so much.

 

“Okay.” The brunet finally agrees.

 

 

 

 

For the next week that follows, Inaho is visibly distracted by something. Slaine catches him staring out the window a few times, and he notices when Inaho’s mind is drifting to somewhere else when they watch TV together. Slaine has to nudge him to get his attention. It is very uncharacteristic of him.

 

It makes Slaine worry, because what could be this distracting to Inaho? It must be something serious; perhaps it has to do with the UFE……

 

“Is Earth at war with Mars again?” The thought caused a wave of anxiety to flood over him. He grabs Inaho by his shoulders, the volume of his voice rising. “Is Her Highness……?”

 

Inaho is startled; he blinks a few times before answering, his tone perplexed. “The war has ended. Earth and Vers are still working in unison. The empress is fine too. There is no need to worry, Slaine.”

 

“Oh, that’s good.” Hearing that relaxes him, although suspicion immediately seized him again. “Then what are you worried about?” He casts him a skeptical glance.

 

“Nothing in particular.” Inaho shifts his gaze a few seconds too quickly. Lying isn’t part of his expertise.

 

 

 

 

 

The brunet’s strange behaviors continue for days. Slaine catches a glimpse of some flowcharts and diagrams Inaho has been making when he brings coffee to his room, and he notices his boyfriend is spending a good portion of the day searching intently on his tablet. He knows something must be troubling him. The blond decides that Inaho was speaking the truth when he said that there is no threat of war breaking out between the two planets again, but what could be the root of Inaho’s concerns then?

 

 _His eye_. The black eyepatch serves as a glum reminder of the injury Inaho received from him. That would explain everything. If it is something that has to do with his eye, Inaho would not bring it up in front of him for sure.

 

As time goes on, Slaine’s worry only grows. He is almost too relieved to hear that Inaho will be going somewhere for a day and won’t be in back time for dinner. 

 

 _He must be going to the doctor, checking up on his health._ Slaine reassures himself as he sends Inaho off at the door. _Everything is going to be fine._ Inaho is in good hands; he remembers him talking about a trusted doctor. After all, he still belongs to the UFE……At the very least, they still see him as a useful asset; they need him in case the relationship between Earth and Vers worsens in the future.

 

Only when Inaho leaves the door does Slaine realizes that he has already fully adapted to being the brunet’s lover. Being concerned for their well-being, hoping for the best for them, wanting to take care of them……these are all evidence of love. It used to be something he thought he could never get used to, now it has slipped past his consciousness and become something as natural as breathing.  

 

 

 

 

Fingers tapping the surface of the table impatiently, Slaine stares at his phone, contemplating whether he should call or not.

 

It is 11:45 at night. Even though Inaho did tell him that he won’t be back till later in the night, this seems rather odd. He can only imagine Inaho having other business to take care of after his checkups, but he doubts it should take that long.

 

He should call, what if something happened when he is on his way to the doctor? His thumb moves over to the call button on the screen. He doesn’t want to mull over all the potential scenarios, but it is entirely possible that Inaho is currently in a condition that requires medical attention.

 

He shouldn’t call, maybe Inaho got called back to some sort of military meeting. His hand slowly moves away. Inaho confirmed that there is no immediate risk of another war, that Earth and Mars are still in good terms, but he never denied that the source of his concern is work related. He doesn’t know much about Inaho’s involvement in the military after the war, as most of what he does is confidential. That too, is very probable.

 

Slaine groans, hand running through his pale blond locks irritably. “That idiot, always so hard to predict……” He takes a deep breath. If he has to measure his two options, Inaho’s safety outweighs everything. Therefore, there is only one answer.

 

Slaine is about to press the button when approaching footsteps are heard and the door is unlocked. The red eyed boy enters the house the same time the clock turns to midnight.

 

 

There are loads words waiting to be spoken in his chest, full of anger and worry, yet all of it are trapped in his throat when he sees what Inaho has brought back with him.

 

It is a four layered cake, each layer of soft sponge cake separated by fresh whipped cream. The cake is covered by a shiny mirror glaze. The sides of the cake are decorated by small, colorful macarons, while delicate pieces of fruit adorned the top of the cake.

 

It is the prettiest cake Slaine has ever seen, and before he has time to react, Inaho has already carried the cake to the table he is sitting in front of.

 

“Happy birthday, Slaine.” Inaho says, his cheeks red from being exposed to the cold air outside. His eye wanders to the digital clock on the wall for a brief second, his expression relaxing when he sees that his timing is perfect. Even with his signature monotone and blank face, the affection from Inaho Kaizuka is still too easy to discern.

 

“What……my……birthday?” Too overwhelmed by what he is seeing, the blond can’t take his eyes away from the beautiful cake. “Did you make this?”

 

“Yes. I had someone instruct me.” Inaho says as he takes off his gloves and hat, a slight smile playing on his lips. “The techniques are comprehensible in theory, but it isn’t as easy in actual practice. It took several trials for me to perfect everything.”

 

“You had someone teach you? Who?” Slaine stares at him wide-eyed. Inaho merely nods, as though he didn’t just create a cake that belongs inside a fancy bakery. “A baker two towns away, I visit him sometimes.” All the puzzle pieces start to fit together. Inaho has always been a good cook, but his baking skills have been improving drastically ever since the first time Slaine asked him to make something for him. All along he had thought that this is only the result of self-studying. After all, the only thing Inaho is innately bad at is expressing his emotions.

 

So he spent the entire day learning how to bake a four layered cake from a professional? This is what he has been researching on his tablet lately? Is this why he was gone for the day, he was making this cake……Slaine’s mouth drops as he realizes something. “Wait, so your head is fine? Your……left eye isn’t bothering you? You didn’t go to the doctors?”

 

“My eye?” Inaho seems equally confused, palm of his hand covering his eyepatch. “No, my health has not deteriorated recently, were you worried……” His voice comes to an abrupt pause, Slaine is sure Inaho has figured it out.

 

“Slaine, I am fine.” The brunet reassures him, a softer glow in his burgundy eye. “I apologize for making you worry.”

 

“Y-you didn’t have to do all this……” The small vibrations in his voice are impossible to ignore. Slaine bites on his lower lip, frantically blinking back the tears that are gathering in his eyes. How foolish is Inaho? To do all this just to surprise him on his birthday, a day that shouldn’t have any meaning to anyone to begin with.

 

“I know you told me not to do anything special, but I didn’t want you to forget,” Inaho takes a small package from his pocket and hands it to Slaine. “That your existence is a day worth celebrating.” A tired smile reaches Slaine’s lips; Inaho really doesn’t give up easily, does he?

 

“What is this?” He takes the package and glances at the brunet.

 

“Your birthday present.” Slaine had said he didn’t want anything, but it is Inaho Kaizuka’s job to always go against his wish. The blond purses his lips, slowly opening the package in front of Inaho. It would be rude of him to not accept Inaho’s present, as he is sure that the brunet put his thought into this. The mysterious item has incited his curiosity; he has no idea what kind of gift Inaho had picked out for him.

 

At first, Slaine can’t tell what the small packets that fell out of the envelop are, but he soon recognizes that they are flower seeds.

 

Vibrant images flashes across his mind, and his throat tightens.

 

The small, beautiful flowers he saw in his dreams, almost within his reach……He had only dared to watch, worried that his touch will cause it to wilt.

 

“You appreciate nature a lot, so I thought perhaps this is something you might enjoy.” There is a hint of hesitation in his voice. “I know you didn’t want any gifts, but I was told that birthday gifts are important, no matter how simple they are. Yuki-nee never forgets the presents, even when we didn’t have a lot of money to spare.”

 

Slaine stares at the flower seed, the lump in his throat makes it hard to swallow, and even more difficult to speak. His eyes are beginning to sting.

 

Can he really do it, with his blood-stained hands?

 

The hands that brought destruction and misery, the hands that crushed the dreams of millions of people, the hands that took away so, so many lives.

 

Can these hands bring life to something this fragile and beautiful?

 

“Inaho……”’ Trembling in his voice, his is shaking, emotions running rapidly through his body. He covers his eyes with his hands, afraid of sounding overly hopeful. The word _future_ feels too heavy on his tongue. “Will you be here to see it blossom?”

 

“Yes.” He can feel Inaho’s hand resting on his shoulder, so warm and accepting, determined and encouraging. Slaine’s gaze lingers on Inaho’s face, and all he can see is unwavering confidence in the reminding maroon colored eye. “I will do whatever I can, to help it grow.”

 

Until the day he can sleep without dreams of war, until the day he can live without fearing his future will inevitably crumble beneath his feet, until the day he learns to be kind to himself, it shall be Inaho’s job to ensure that the flower of Slaine Troyard’s happiness bloom.

 

Some wounds take years to heal, while others may never heal. What is important for now, is for him to be able to look at himself in the mirror, lift his head up high and smile, knowing that the pain he feels is proof that he is still alive. In a world that has never been forgiving to him, he can still see the beauty in it.

 

 

“We will start from the first step, there is a lot to learn, but I promise, I won’t allow it to fail.” The corners of Inaho’s lips turn upward. Despite the tears that are falling from his eyes, Slaine finds himself doing the same, as their fingers intertwine.

 

 

 

 

_“This time, let’s start from zero……together.”_


End file.
